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- How To Be Worst Host
How To Be Worst Host This Coming Holiday Season
It's Party Time! Fall is finally here, football is back, and Halloween is just around the corner. Whoa, where did the year go!? Stores are already advertising their Thanksgiving turkeys, and my mind automatically fast forwards to Christmas.
I take great pride in being a party pooper. My parties don't contain alcohol. But there's more my fellow human beings. The stuff I give away at Halloween isn't what kids and their parents are expecting. Worse, I don't serve pumpkin pie at Thanksgiving. Heck, I don't even buy pumpkin pie! I'm a bit of a Grinch when it comes to stocking stuffers. And quite possibly the worst: I'm in bed at 9:00 postmeridian on New Years Eve.
But wait! Please don't leave! My parties are always filled with fun and laughter! Really! I once threw the ultimate surprise birthday party to end all parties. My trick: I created fun and meaningful ways to keep the guests perpetually surprised. Almost 30 years later people still talk about that party! No drugs, no alcohol, no chemicals, just good clean fun.
Laughter is indeed the best medicine. Fear and its immune-suppressing offspring Hate, Anger, Anxiety, and Aggravation ruin parties like nothing else. Just like people still remember that fantastic party of yore, I bet you remember at least one holiday gathering that stressed you out. I bet you still get the heebie-jeebies thinking out it. Or maybe you got drunk and did something that you're still ashamed of. I'm not anti-party, I'm pro-laughter.
That means that I'm the worst host ever...for pathogens. Laughter vibrates the vagus nerve which runs from your brain to all of your organs. It's the size of your middle finger. Anything you can do to engage the vagus nerve gives the middle finger to the things that can ruin parties.
On Halloween I see all those kids dressed up as cute as can be, braving all the death symbolism to come to my front door so that I can give them toxin-filled candy? NO! I pass out organic chocolate. It's expensive but I want kids to have all-organic ingredient chocolate. That's just me though. I wouldn't dare tell you what to pass out for Halloween. Really! So, why not get your treats from Cost Plus/World Market, it's only a little bit extra. After shopping at CP/WM, buy the same from a gas station and compare the ingredients. Because CP/WM imports their candy from Europe, by law it must not contain certain ingredients. Same companies make the same products with two different sets of ingredients: one for USA and one without banned ingredients.
In Halloween's past we've been handing out carcinogens to kids. We rationalize "But wait! my kids didn't get cancer!" True, but carcinogens actively suppress the immune system by killing off gut microbes; it's the same in the soil which is why 'farm chemicals' are banned. Unhealthy soil=unhealthy plants=unhealthy people. See what a party pooper I am?
I started making my own 'pumpkin' pies a very long time ago. Here's what happened. I saw a Sunset Magazine cover of a squash pie and knew I had to make it. I bought it and walked into the ultra tiny Seal Beach Market and fell in love with the ginormous 3 foot long pink banana squash resting on top of the produce section. After I cooked it I had soooo much squash filling that I wound up making exactly 9 pies. And they were fantastic! All organic ingredients. (20+ years later I found out that a farmer in nearby Los Alamitos had resurrected it via a seed bank).
You'll be relieved to know that I do not grow my own Turkeys. I avoid the growth hormone brands and seek out wild turkeys from Nebraska (I have a tiny network of friends who know their farmers). Not only are they expensive, but they survived in the wild by out-running and outwitting foxes, coyotes and bobcats. As a result they are the best-tasting and healthiest turkey I've ever had.
Avoid the chemicals in whipping cream and make your own. Two ingredients: heavy whipping cream and organic powdered sugar. Cream: read the label to make sure that it doesn't contain genetically modified pond scum. It goes by the nom-de-guerre of 'gellan gum'.
By Thanksgiving, the winter weather has slowly set in and days are much noticeably shorter. It's game-time for pathogens! Have you been a good host? Or have you been naughty but still hoping a guy in red suit with chronic gut inflammation is going to look the other way when the doctor gives you a prescription in February?
Between Thanksgiving and Christmas the stress really piles on like nothing else. Expectations clash with reality which causes gut microbes to die of just enough to allow pathogens start their party. Feeling low and in need of a boost that sunshine can give you, you reach for the sweets and alcohol. "Oh, alcohol, how long I've waited to feel your sweet death sooth my throat as you slowly kill me through many silent nights in the cold of winter!"
By the middle of January your Vitamin D levels are at their lowest because not enough sunlight gets through to your gut microbiome where microbes manufacture vitamin D. Most people are at their most susceptible. They're rundown after 6+ weeks of microbe-killing food and toxins, not enough exercise to replenish the innate immune system's killer T-cells, and in many cases stressed by lack of income and higher debts.
See how I went from funny to serious? Same thing happens with your immune system every November-February. It's a drag. In addition to my not-so subtle tips above, here's what I do to boost my immune system.
Viruses aren't the problem, individual susceptibility is the problem. Be pro-healthy immunity. And anti-fear.— Jennifer Margulis (@JenniferMarguli) September 28, 2020
Get rid of every carcinogen in your house. That's all household cleaning agents and personal care products which contain many of the 1,328 ingredients banned in Europe. If you have any products marked in your house, replace it with with an eco-friendly product such as Dr. Bronners. If something doesn't harm the environment, it can't harm you the way that toxins do. If the vapors are harmful believe it!
Being the worst host during the holidays can make you a healthier, happier person.